Only 75,00 left for free international shipping!

Did surgery awaken more of my childhood trauma?

childhood trauma

My heart is pounding in my chest, I start to sweat. I know what’s happening but I still can’t help freaking out. In that moment I want to escape to somewhere no one will ever find me. I very well know what this means. This is the mental state I never wanted to find myself in again. It’s happening.. all over again.

You know how catching a cold can lead to an infection and get worse if you don’t treat it well? That works the same for our mental health. I remember feeling extremely bad mentally after surgery, hoping to get better again. I just pulled through and acted my positive self. Some new memories of my childhood traumas came up and in many moments, I feel a constant need to just sit in my own bubble, not talk to anyone, I have the feeling that I can’t set boundaries. Also, boundaries need to be respected in order for them to be effective.

At the moment of the panic attack I was sitting on my safe couch, my mind racing at events I seemed not to have thought about for a long time, but all of a sudden started to flash back before my eyes. I thought I was going batshit crazy, knowing there’s no way for me to escape at all. I needed to get away, to be able to breathe, I needed help.

At that exact moment I received an email. My mother-in-law had sent me books for me to read. And at that moment it was good. Apparently a little (virtual) care package was all I needed at that moment. And I’m thankful for those little moments that drag me out of the deep waters called anxiety.

xoxo

Prudence

If you want to get early access to my work, as my Patron, you’ll get early access to everything I create via www.patreon.com/planetprudence or shop at www.planetprudence.com

You may also like

10 signs you’re dealing with a narcissistic person

10 signs you’re dealing with a narcissistic person - Detaching yourself from a narcissistic person is difficult, requires a lot of energy, standing your ground, keeping your boundaries and so much more, and it can still take ages and decades to be fully detached. Often being in the narcissist’s control is something that you didn’t see coming, never noticed happening and believe me, it’s something you couldn’t control either way. The narcissist wants what the narcissist wants.
Read more

Your Vagina is NOT supposed to Smell Like Flowers

Your Vagina isn't supposed to Smell Like Flowers - it's supposed to smell like Vagina. “Flower scented” hygienic products like liners, pads or even scented perfumes are all over the shelves in our convenient stores, giving young women the message that our vagina is supposed to smell like flowers. Don’t be fooled, this is just another marketing trick to make you think you actually need these products to make your intimate area smell “better”.
Read more

Period pain is not supposed to feel like dying

People always say “it’s normal” to experience extreme period pain. Only.. there is no scale to measure pain.
Read more

Kintsugi for your soul

Kintsugi is the Japanese art of putting broken pottery pieces together with gold. It’s built on the idea that you can create a stronger and more beautiful work of art after it has been broken. I was thinking.. maybe..
Read more

Comments

There are no comments yet. Be the first to write one!
Comment
Your comment has been added and is awaiting approval